Funny place Consett; for a start it's a lot further away than you think. By the time you get there you fancy you should be seeing lakes and mountains, but you don't, just sheep. You are however, up a good height, which got me to thinking whether the laws of nature that give those mountain men from Kenya and Ethiopia such an advantage when they come down to sea level to run against our plucky lads also apply to Consett footballers? Does plying your trade on a regular basis in the thin air of the Belle Vue mean that your legs go round a lot easier when you come down to the flatlands? Should there be a handicap system in the Northern League that negates this advantage? And if so, how much more would it apply to Tow Law? Could be fun when reporting the results, "Consett won 1-0 but thanks to the high altitude factor being applied the final result goes down as 2-1 to RCA", "Tow Law were going well in the race for the championship until the mountain handicap kicked in and they were docked 12 points". Well, the management committee would have something else to do other than worrying about bad language, which might be a blessing; not that I am religious you understand. Or over sensitive. Or suggesting anybody else is.
Anyway I only jest of course, nothing wrong with being up high, I could do with being up six feet higher myself but there you go....
The cover of last month's Northern Ventures was good wasn't it? Did you see it? A famous, though sadly non existent, quote, over a picture of a famous 18th Century political writer who supposedly said it, equally supposedly worrying about the impact of a revolution that plunged Europe into war for 25 years and resulted in the death of millions, and drawing comparisons between such conflict and a bit of "bad language" in football grounds. Over the top? Well, maybe just a little....
Anyway back to matters in our own little world. The dismal form at home continues, not to mention the dismal crowds. Sorry to go back to altitude, but the higher we get up the league the fewer people turn up to watch. Is this the Sunderland disease? The resolute certainty that no matter how good it gets it will all go tits up shortly? Probably, probably. Still they maybe right, if we can't beat Shields and Penrith, canny lads as they all are, then who are we kidding about higher leagues? Or is at all just a cunning ploy to get the council worrying? Mind, rumour has it the ball netting is finally going to be raised down the bottom end, so does this mean Tracey will be giving the boys their balls back? Do they need them? Will they be any use if she does? Or Spenny, Norton and Farringdon Club's for that matter. I only ask....